You'd think I would have learned by now. After thirty-two years of living in this body, you'd reckon I know it's workings and how to care for it. But no, I still allow my fears to hold me back, thus worsening the matter at hand.
Case in point: my second wisdom tooth removal.
Last August I started getting signals that my upper-left wisdom tooth should get removed. I felt the same tension I had in 2009, before my lower-left tooth came out. I felt the same headaches and the same crookedness of the rest of my teeth. But I didn't do anything.
Then in September I got a referral from our dentist, for surgery. He indicated that thing really needed to come out. But I didn't do anything.
For the past two months I've been feeling more and more discomfort in my mouth. Dull aches, crookedness and food getting stuck between my last two molars. But I didn't do anything.
Because I'm a scaredy-cat. This wisdom tooth will require the same treatment as the other one: the nasty jab of the anasthetics, cut open my gums, shatter the tooth and pull out all the remains, then suture things up. And then the pain starts. Last time, the pain lasted for at least two weeks and messed with workdays completely.
It was a surreal experience, with plenty of pain afterwards. That's why I'm scared. I was already afraid, but my first operation made it worse. Despite the lessons I learned last time. So yes, I've been putting it off and off and off. And now I'm paying for it, because this week I've started getting aches. And I still postponed, hiding behind excuses like "I lost the referal" and "I'll phone tomorrow". Fscking idiot ( =_=)
On tonight's menu: pain. Huzzah! And there was much rejoicing! /o/
I've dug up the referal letter, Marli set up an appointment for 02/05 and I'll phone tomorrow to see if they can't help me before the weekend. And we're prepping as much as possible, to prevent a panic attack, by gathering as much of the required post-surgery materials. We're making ice cubes, we've got painkillers, I've got my hyperventilation bags and we've dug up the 3M hotcold pack.
There's no escaping now: this needs to be done.
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All content, with exception of "borrowed" blogpost images, or unless otherwise indicated, is copyright of Thomas Sluyter. The character Kilala the cat-demon is copyright of Rumiko Takahashi and used here without permission.