2012-04-26 19:52:00
You'd think I would have learned by now. After thirty-two years of living in this body, you'd reckon I know it's workings and how to care for it. But no, I still allow my fears to hold me back, thus worsening the matter at hand.
Case in point: my second wisdom tooth removal.
Last August I started getting signals that my upper-left wisdom tooth should get removed. I felt the same tension I had in 2009, before my lower-left tooth came out. I felt the same headaches and the same crookedness of the rest of my teeth. But I didn't do anything.
Then in September I got a referral from our dentist, for surgery. He indicated that thing really needed to come out. But I didn't do anything.
For the past two months I've been feeling more and more discomfort in my mouth. Dull aches, crookedness and food getting stuck between my last two molars. But I didn't do anything.
Because I'm a scaredy-cat. This wisdom tooth will require the same treatment as the other one: the nasty jab of the anasthetics, cut open my gums, shatter the tooth and pull out all the remains, then suture things up. And then the pain starts. Last time, the pain lasted for at least two weeks and messed with workdays completely.
It was a surreal experience, with plenty of pain afterwards. That's why I'm scared. I was already afraid, but my first operation made it worse. Despite the lessons I learned last time. So yes, I've been putting it off and off and off. And now I'm paying for it, because this week I've started getting aches. And I still postponed, hiding behind excuses like "I lost the referal" and "I'll phone tomorrow". Fscking idiot ( =_=)
On tonight's menu: pain. Huzzah! And there was much rejoicing! /o/
I've dug up the referal letter, Marli set up an appointment for 02/05 and I'll phone tomorrow to see if they can't help me before the weekend. And we're prepping as much as possible, to prevent a panic attack, by gathering as much of the required post-surgery materials. We're making ice cubes, we've got painkillers, I've got my hyperventilation bags and we've dug up the 3M hotcold pack.
There's no escaping now: this needs to be done.
View or add comments (curr. 7)
Posted by Luthien
You'll be fine! Just have it over with and you'll be done forever.
You need: ice, ice, ice, the painkillers they prescribe, yoghurt/vla/liquid food. And A.Vogel has these pills that you can take before the surgery, so the bruising will be less afterwards. Helped me a lot!
And remember: try to keep your neck relaxed during the surgery, so you won't have such a big headache.
You'll be fine :) Really. I've had it 2 times, each time 2 teeth at once. Still alive and not afraid to do it again :)
Posted by GJ
I also had 2*2 wisdom teeth removed. Was very scared as well both of the times and postponed it for a long time. I had needlephobia for a long time and recognize everything you write about panic-attacks. Therefore I respect the way you write about it so openly.
My tips:
Always realize that you are in control. You are not the hedgehog watching the headlights coming closer. You are the lion that tolerates the flees. Act according to this statement! Don't shrink or be quiet, but try to make contact with everyone and everything in the room like you own the place. In preparation to the surgery, when you think of it and feel like the hedgehog again: Just shake your shoulders viciously and growl! You are not undergoing it, you are defying it! This may sound very silly to do, but it is important to make this a victory-moment and not a defeat-moment.
And wether you're 32, 64 or 128: overcoming oneself will always be a battle. Good luck, strong man!
Posted by Cailin Coilleach
Thanks for the kind words J :)
I like how you just extrapolated the ages by powers of two :p
Posted by Menno
What is this calling you a chicken shit and all? Do you feel you need to punish yourself in some way for your behaviour by making it public? Don't worry, by putting it off your tooth will punish you soon enough ;).
Or is it out already?
Posted by Cailin Coilleach
Oh, it's out now :)
Interesting analysis though! Yes, I do think I'm trying to kick my own ass by opening up myself :)
Posted by Menno
Good the tooth is out!
And yes, contrary to popular (implicit) belief we do'n't have to suffer before good things can happen to us. Good things are in our grasp right now.
All content, with exception of "borrowed" blogpost images, or unless otherwise indicated, is copyright of Thomas Sluyter. The character Kilala the cat-demon is copyright of Rumiko Takahashi and used here without permission.
2012-04-27 02:21:00
Posted by lina (website)
Oh dear. Hope the procedure will be smooth. Take care.