2011-07-31 15:24:00
As mentioned a few weeks ago I finally went to have a chat with a local healthcare worker about my anxieties. For the better part of an hour I explained my experiences and my theories about what might be behind it all. To summarize the talk:
One of the things that the doc found remarkable was the light hearted fashion in which I discussed it all. He found it interesting that I was smiling, talking quite happily and that I seemed relaxed. No telling if "interesting" means "good", "bad" or had absolutely no judgement of value at all. Anyway...
The doc suggested I give Christine van Boeijen's self help methods a try. This involves exercises where I get to understand fear and thought and where I get more familiar with my own anxieties. The method also requires me to have a buddy, for which I'll ask both Menno and Marli for their help. The first as my heterosexual lifemate, the latter as my wife and both know me through-and-through. The first an expert in reflection, the latter a strong+stern support.
So yes... working on it!
kilala.nl tags: health, anxiety,
View or add comments (curr. 1)
2011-07-31 15:07:00
... but one day I -will- make a shirt out of this.
For those unfamiliar with the character of Ming-Ming Duckling, she's a character from one of Dana's favourite kids' shows on Nick Jr: Wonder Pets. Most of the show's dialogue is sung to music which I kind of enjoy, but which really grates on Marli's nerves. You could say that she's as allergic to the show as her own mother was to Sonic the Hedgehog ^_^ One sure-fire way to agitate her is to hum a few bars of the theme song.
But stil... A nice&decent, high quality t-shirt with the "THIS IS SEWIOUS!" tagline would be strangely fitting for the office :p Sysadmin work is highly serious, especially when your servers are used to transfer millions of euros... but on the other hand you need a good sense of humor if you want to cope with the daily goings-on.
kilala.nl tags: geeky,
View or add comments (curr. 5)
2011-07-30 23:37:00
Practiced again with Martijn tonight and I learned two things. Or actually, I knew them as a matter-of-course, but their importance was impressed upon me once more.
kilala.nl tags: kendo, sports,
View or add comments (curr. 0)
2011-07-28 21:05:00
I follow a whole bunch of blogs about various aspects of Japanese modern culture. Most of them, predictably, cover the anime/manga community and of course trains. One or two however are about art and fashion, including 8Tokyo who recently did a post about the Tokyo Art Book Fair 2011. I gave it a cursory glance, forwarded it to my über-artsy sister and thought nothing more of it. Until I went back today, to take another look.
I've known about doujinshi for ages, both from exposure in the Netherlands and from reading/buying original Japanese publications. So the concept of self-published comic books is nothing new to me. So why am I so surprised about the art zine community? Folks who publish their own art in booklets, pamphlets and various other forms... (it reminds me of the copybook culture from Templar AZ). There's some really great and creative stuff out there and I would really love to visit a fair or two like this one! The lovely Ebony Bizys, aka Hello Sandwich, published a short write-up of the Fair including some great photographs. And then the fine folks of 8Tokyo go on to make their first art zine: Necocoa (neko + cocoa = cat + chocolate).
Being on the subject of these art zines also reminds me of the concept of mooks: magazine books. Big, lovely, great looking books full of photographs and artwork! I love leafing through stuff like that! A while ago I bought the Coffee Hour mook on Zinio which is a feast for the eyes to anybody who loves coffee ^_^ Here's one of the two-page spreads.
There's two other mooks that I'll probably have to order for delivery while we're in Japan this fall. Not for myself, but for my sister who also loves the finish design company Marimekko. They published two e-mooks (mooks with an added gift, often a bag): a 1951-2000 retrospective and their 60th anniversary book.
kilala.nl tags: japan,
View or add comments (curr. 0)
2011-07-28 20:32:00
A few days ago Menno gifted me volume 1 of a little known manga: Sasameke, by Ryuji Gotsubo. He'd remembered that I like manga and anime about sports and stumbled upon a soccer story with a very eye catching cover. I quite like the story and the art, but was surprised upon reaching the third part of the volume... surprised in a From dusk till dawn kind of way, because all of a sudden there's an uninvincible body-builder mom fighting hospital wardens, agents and the father of her daughter! All the while jumping around and eating raw fish from a lake..
0_0; ... ... yea ...
So! All of a sudden the author hits me with this great quote from a young soccer player whose friends were almost bullied away from their practice field (things got sorted out though)... "I'm just a powerless child. All I have to my name is potential." I'll need to give that some more thought :)
kilala.nl tags: manga,
View or add comments (curr. 2)
2011-07-24 16:48:00
Last January I wrote we were giving potty training Dana a try. Back then we introduced her to toilets and such but after that it all petered off a bit. Now that it's summer holiday and Dana's staying home from school Marli has put in all of her efforts to get Dana properly trained. I'm very proud of my two ladies! They've made great progress!
Not only can Dana properly use her potty, but she's also learned the feeling of a full bladder. So now it's become common to see her suddenly drop what she's doing, walk to her potty, drop her pants and sit down. Awesome! And if that wasn't cool enough, Marli's taught her something else as well!
While I've been trying to teach her to count to ten, Marli's actually succeeded ^_^ When Dana's on her potty, Marli makes her count to ten (sometimes twice). On the one hand to distract her so she'll loosen her muscles, on the other to indicate how long she needs to sit down. And what I couldn't manage, she's now done: without fail Dana can now count to ten. What's more, she can solve puzzles such as the "Tellen van 1 tot 10" puzzle by Deltas one, which requires her to combine a written number, a number of drawings and a number of dots. So she'll put together the pieces with a four, four rowing boats and four coloured dots. Nice!
kilala.nl tags: baby,
View or add comments (curr. 0)
2011-07-24 16:37:00
Since her gastric bypass operation last October Marli has lost roughly 48 kilos (105 pounds), which means that she's well on her way to her desired weight. In the mean time it means that she's shedding clothing sizes left and right! While she could fit into some of her old jeans very quickly we've now reached the point that she can actually wear -my- clothes.
Because my North Face coat's pretty old and not very weather proof anymore we've bought her a brand new one. It might not've been the cheapest choice, but it's a great coat and it looks a heck of a lot better than her 5XL coat left-over from her days with the dutch railways. Then today she surprised me by showing up, wearing my Hanshin Tigers uniform that Kaijuu sent from Japan in 2009. Whoa!
View or add comments (curr. 1)
2011-07-20 05:33:00
As I said before: I'm becoming lazy. Instead of chomping at the bit for more kendo practice I was actually trying to find excuses to cancel last night's practice. I'm glad that Marli didn't let me and that Martijn was showing such enthusiasm :) If anything, last night's exhaustion tells me that I still love kendo and that I really do need to keep up my practice (both in running and in kendo).
So that's one lesson learned, but what else was there?
kilala.nl tags: sports, kendo,
View or add comments (curr. 0)
2011-07-14 07:34:00
Ever since I was a young teenager, I think I was twelve or thirteen, I've been banking with Postbank (which was rolled into ING Bank a few years back). Menno and I opened our bank accounts roughly at the same times, or actually: he did it first and I followed suit, how it went with many things back then :)
So for almost twenty years we've been with Postbank / ING. They handle our bank accounts, they handle our insurance, they even have our mortgage. But now we're leaving, not because of bad service or because of bad products (though they're not stellar), but because of a gut feeling. So now we're consolidating things at Rabobank, the bank where I had my first children's account :)
I've also very recently done something that I should've done at least six years ago. When we got our mortgage, I should've immediately figured out how often we'd be allowed to repay parts of the debt and to which amounts. Turns out that we're allowed to repay up to 10% on a yearly basis. So that's been a missed chance! :(
So... Because we're now expected to actually be responsible adults (we've had a few years of practice now, right?) we've rethought our financial planning. We now have two long-term saving plans (one time deposit and one savings insurance) and one short-term savings box for expenditures and emergencies. The long-term plans will be left mostly as they are, while the short-term box will need to remain at roughly 12k. Anything available beyond that will be used to repay our mortgage, thus lowering our monthly interest (and slowly freeing up more money).
kilala.nl tags: life,
View or add comments (curr. 3)
2011-07-13 21:56:00
Recently I've been having a hankering for a good shmup, a shooter, a hectic and adrenaline-ridden game. I don't care that I suck at these games, I love'm nonetheless.
Torus Trooper gave me exactly what I needed, in a native Mac OS X game no less! A fantastic, beating soundtrack, simple gameplay and it really sucks me in. It's even a free game! It rocks.
Having grown up in the nineties, on games such as Xenon 2 and Hellfire (gameplay video, Mistoffelees will remember the arcade cabinet we played in Denmark), I craved something more "classic" though. So out comes the PC Engine emulator*! NEC's PC Engine console was famous for its great shooters... I just had to give it a whirl!
And now? Now I'm happily entertaining myself with games that are no less than twenty years old! The awesomely "engrish" Download, the frantic Aero Blasters, and the beautiful Aldynes. And there's dozens more!
*: Magic Engine for OS X might not be free, but it's excellent! Also, image borrowed from shmups.com.
View or add comments (curr. 0)
2011-07-13 21:11:00
We've no clue what's up, but the past few months Marli's been having dizzy spells. Initially it was expected that she was a bit hypotensive, but her health checks out. Her BP is great and her blood works showed no problems at all.
So imagine our surprise when last Saturday, during a cooking workshop, she gets faint and actually blacks out for a tiny while (but remains fully conscious)! Luckily a short breather outside got her back feeling well again. But then things went sour today. We'd been to the bank for some business and had walked into the butcher's for some groceries. While I'm outside, entertaining Dana, I suddenly see Marli look out the window, searching for me with a look of utter dread on her face. While in line, both her hearing and sight blacked out and she got really dizzy, but again she remained conscious. After a breather she felt okay again, though she was white (or yellow actually) as chalk.
No fscking clue what's up, but I don't like it one bit. Especially that the GP and so forth can't find anything wrong. Urgh :(
kilala.nl tags: health, body, meh,
View or add comments (curr. 5)
2011-07-12 13:13:00
So yeah, looking back on my life I've always had a varying degree of social anxiety. As a kid I'd get "school sick" because of a bully in my class, in school I avoided parties when I could and bowed out early ("I'm not feeling well"), I'd feel queesy on holidays and would often rather stay home than go on trips. Most of these things persist to this day, though I always thought it was just:
While #1 might be true to a degree, in recent years I've realized that it well and truly is anxiety and it's been getting worse with age. To the degree that I do not handle unexpected outings well ("hey honey, let's go into town on your way home from work!"), nor can I properly cope with unknown environments (case in point, our trips to England and Denmark). So yes, even a phone call while I'm on the train home, asking me to make a detour into the city can leave me dazed and nauseous.
For now I'm trying to keep things in check by forcing myself through it... So yes, this afternoon I will in fact go into town. And in order to really tackle the problems I have finally scheduled an appointment with our local specialist on the subject.
Also, Menno's recent gift of a book on mindfulness ought to be helpful. I've read through it once, now I'll need to re-read it and actually integrate those aspects that I find interesting and useful.
kilala.nl tags: anxiety,
View or add comments (curr. 5)
2011-07-11 07:00:00
Had an interesting, anxiety-induced event on Saturday, which only let loose in the accompanying release and thus hyperventilation on Sunday evening/night. Slept through most of the hyperventilation and the pain that comes with it. :)
kilala.nl tags: hyperventilation,
View or add comments (curr. 3)
2011-07-05 07:28:00
Last night, despite muscle aches* and tiredness, Martijn and I got together for another training session. After stretching and a little suburi I followed Menno's advice and decided to forego any real focus on the small/fast men strike.
First off, Martijn was interesting in practicing jodan no kamae, which is a completely different stance than is normally used and taught. Whereas chudan no kamae is both safe and stable, jodan has both drawbacks and positive sides. For example, while extending the kendoka's reach considerably (at least half a pace), the raised shinai leaves both the do and the left kote open for attack.
With Martijn having practiced some men strikes from jodan we then proceeded with something that I could use more of: jigeiko. With Martijn wearing his bogu it was up to me to practice seme and to create an opening for myself. As I already know (and as Martijn remarked yesterday) I'm about as threatening as an arctic rabbit, so this is good practice for me!
Stuff we practiced:
*: I helped lay laminate flooring at Kaijuu's new house last weekend. I love doing that as it's part puzzle, part physical and all manual labour ^_^
kilala.nl tags: kendo, sports,
View or add comments (curr. 3)
2011-07-02 09:03:00
A few months ahead of her birthday I ordered Marli's present, in preparation of our trip to Japan. Finally, after years of wanting a more capable camera, Marli got a DSLR camera. Because this is her first DSLR and because she's got a steep learning curve up ahead we got her the Canon 1100D which basically is the cheapest model to be found. I'm quite amazed by the quality of the images that come from this thing.
It's great that she's got such a wiling model living with us :D
kilala.nl tags: geeky,
View or add comments (curr. 2)
2011-07-01 17:10:00
I really should make myself do more kendo practice at home. I don't know why I started slacking, but it's dumb. ಠ_ಠ
So thank $DEITY that Martijn SMSed me, asking if I was up for practice! No excuse to slack off anymore! We took a lot of time trying to get me to understand the movements for fast men, but I still don't get the right movements. I can do the thrust just fine, but for now I cannot manage to work in the required smack! to make a hit. We did manage to make a few nice potholes in the lawn, practicing fumikomi and hayasuburi ^_^;
Martijn also let me try on his bogu. The tare, kote and do are just fine and wearing them was actually quite comfortable. Putting on the men it was soon clear that, while my glasses do fit under there, the helmet really doesn't fit well doing so. This means that I need sports glasses, contacts or laser surgery, just like I was foretold. Meh... :/
Getting struck on the do doesn't hurt at all, unless it misses :p The kote strikes were a bit sharp and the men hits were pretty... interesting, that's the word.
kilala.nl tags: kendo, sports,
View or add comments (curr. 6)
All content, with exception of "borrowed" blogpost images, or unless otherwise indicated, is copyright of Thomas Sluyter. The character Kilala the cat-demon is copyright of Rumiko Takahashi and used here without permission.
